Finding your day-to-day focus

With a clear focus, we thrive and without it, we falter. So, how do you find the right focus for your day-to-day life....?

Focus

Part 1. Your day-to-day

In the six weeks leading up to Christmas, I was writing a non-fiction book. I’d had the choice between having this book published in the following May or September and I went for May. I like to work fast and hard but also, it meant I’d get all the parts of my advance sooner (you get a chunk on signing the contract, a chunk on publication day and so on).

It also meant that I had to write a book that should probably take at least six months … in six weeks. It was possible, because I’d had this book idea in my head for some years and I’d written such a detailed proposal that I was able to follow that structure. But it could have become rather overwhelming.

However, I found that six-week period to be the most enjoyable of my year so far. I cancelled all daytime social events and dedicated my Monday to Friday, during school hours, to writing the book. That included interviewing lots of people on Zoom, whose stories I included in the book.

I know that part of the reason for me enjoying the book-writing process so much was that as I was writing about raising your SQ (spiritual intelligence), I was raising my own. I was walking in nature, meditating while asking for answers to questions I was posing in the book, having regular breathwork sessions and committing fully to my daily spiritual rituals. 

I felt clearheaded and focused and really good in body, mind and spirit.

As I approached the deadline, and knew that I would be able to hand in the manuscript not just on time, but actually ahead of time, I had Dr Louise Lagendijk’s words in my mind: Having focus is a highly underestimated element of health.

She’d told me, during an interview for my book, that her patients will come to her complaining of pain or illness and after checking all their nutrient levels, gut health and the physical side of things, she’ll check their mental health and eventually, the patient will say: hold on, I’ve just realised I don’t like how I’m spending my day-to-day.

They don’t have the right FOCUS.

It occurred to me that I had felt so deeply fulfilled during that period because I was completely focused on one task: writing the book. 

Within that, I was able to design rituals and routines that made me feel good as I wrote the book. I was also interviewing people so I had that feeling of connection. But the FOCUS element was about knowing how I was spending my time, which is perhaps a normal feeling for employed people but less so for us freelancers and business owners. 

I then had a Christmas break and enjoyed time with family and friends, drank a bit much, let some of my rituals and routines slip, but in general, I liked the contrast. I felt excited at the start of January, as I always do, but then, as I started to pitch for articles relating to my book, and get a few commissions, things felt bitty. 

I needed to get my teeth stuck into something that I could focus on for a number of weeks. It needed to be something that would pay. Because it’s when I have money coming in that I’m able to then do my purely creative work without any fear or guilt.

This is how I came to designing this online course. I’d been speaking to my mum about the journalism and how commissions were trickling in, but it took a lot of pitching to get there and I never knew where it might lead. It felt unstable and also, journalism just doesn’t pay very well so it wasn’t sustainable. 

She said to me: are you missing writing your book? And it felt like such an insightful question. She could see how calm and creative I was while writing my book, and now, I had lost some of that. I said: I really am. And decided to work out which project I could focus on next.

I thought I could write a novel, but as I started writing, the ideas were a bit shit and it ended up being more essay/short story than novel. I didn’t feel inspired to keep going with it. Also, with a novel, you have to write the entire thing before you can get a book deal. Again, financially, this wasn’t the best option for me. 

I reflected on the last time I’d felt really good in body, mind and spirit.

It was when I was deep in creating courses and marketing them. I felt that same sense of calm that I’d had while I was writing the book. I knew what I was doing. And I guiltlessly spent time doing rituals that made me feel really good, as I knew this would help new creative ideas to land.

My central nervous system really likes it when I’m focused.

I think it’s the same for all of us.

Creating courses again gives me focus but also control. I like having some control over when I’m making money. So the plan is to spend my time writing books as they’re commissioned and in between, to grow my Substack and use this platform to do writing and teaching, through articles and courses.

I’m creating a structure to my days and weeks, doing something I love and find fulfilling. And this is also my regular income stream. Basically, I’m picking out the two types of work (writing books, creating courses) that have led to me getting into that ventral vagal flow-state and combining them to create the ideal career (for me).

So, that’s how I came to understand the importance of focus, and to work out how to arrange my own work-life to ensure there’s always a clear focus. And that it’s the right one.

Now, over to you. I’m going to ask you a series of questions and you might like to press pause between each one, if you’re listening to this on audio in the Substack app, or listen all the way through and then head to the script below and read the questions there before answering them. 

Your focus

Okay, let’s go…

As a child, what did you want to be - work-wise - when you grew up?

Are you doing any of that now?

If not, why not?

If you are, does it still feel like the most important work for you to be doing?

If you were to spend a day doing just one thing, what would it be?

What do you love about doing that thing?

Does this connect to your work, or could it?

Imagine I said that I would pay you £100,000 a year, every year, and you could decide what work you were doing. What would you be doing?

How many days a week?

What would your working hours be?

What would you be doing between or around those working hours to make you feel good (hobbies, exercise, etc)?

How much time would you spend alone and how much time would you spend with other people?

How do you make money at the moment?

Do you like earning money in this way?

If you’re not currently earning, or don’t like how you’re earning money, what would feel like the most amazing way to earn your income?

Who do you look to and think: I would love to work like that; to do what they are doing?

Do you like the idea of doing one type of work for a long time, let’s say years, or doing shorter projects?

What fits better with your personal life: having employment/ongoing client work or picking up projects then having periods of no paid work?

What part of running your own business do you love?

What do you hate?

What are you best at?

What would you love to delegate?

I’d love to hear what’s come up for you, in the comments, if you’d like to share.

But first, one last exercise.

It can take confidence to commit to focusing on the thing you really love doing. Or even to feel you deserve to design your day in a way that answers all your needs, wants and desires (like weaving in a morning swim, or an afternoon coffee with a friend).

And if you’re clear on what your dream career is but you’re not doing it - perhaps you want to be a full-time artist, or you’re ready for a promotion - that’s down to self-belief too.

Doubt isn’t always right. Often, it’s not. And we’re going to be working on confidence over the next few modules. But for today, I’d like you to do The Success Timeline exercise.

You may have done this before, that’s fine. It’s worth repeating whenever your confidence is dipping.

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The Success Timeline

Make a list of everything you’d achieved from birth until now. This is going to take some time, because you’ve achieved a lot when you really break it down. Spend as long as you like reflecting on your past achievements. This will remind you that you are capable, successful and brilliant. And that you can shift the focus of your day-to-day, if you decide you’d like to.

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Here’s module 2:

Love,

Annie x